I cannot take responsibility for your enlightenment (or vice versa)

[redbird]

This was prompted by rmjwell and cakmpls discussing whether it is the job of people in oppressed groups to educate people outside those groups:

One of the things people mean by "it's not my job to educate you about X" is "I've done this already, I've answered these questions a hundred times, I refuse to spend my life doing so because so many people won't pick up a book on the subject, or watch a video."

That's doubly so either when it's a relatively small minority experience--there are a lot more heterosexuals who need to educate themselves about what it's like to be queer than there are articulate, out lesbians, bisexuals, and gay men to do the educating.

It's doubly so when the thing that people need to understand is in itself a major burden--someone mentioned having a child with Asperger's, for example.

It's doubly so when part of the burden is being looked at as an outsider, and the questions are phrased as "tell me about your people" rather than as "you're one of us, I'd like to understand this aspect of your life better."

Comments

[dichroic.livejournal.com]

I do feel like I have some responsibilities because I'm Jewish, but in most cases, it feels like an opportunity when I get to educate someone about my own experience. (Or if it doesn't, I don't have to do it. I always answer direct questions, and I never let a phrase like "jew him down pass, but I don't have to volunteer information if I'm too tired.)

Where it feels like a duty is in relation to other groups. I do try to call people on it, sometimes subtly, when I catch a major "us/them"ing or in other cases of obvious prejudice. For me, it's all part of "for ye were strangers in a strange land".

[liv]

If this comment hadn't already been here when I saw the post, I would have posted something very like it. Educating people about Judaism and what it's like to be Jewish I see as both a responsibility and an opportunity, one I'm glad of. And of course I make sure to point out that I'm not speaking for all Jews everywhere, duh. My explanation usually starts with mentioning the origin of the expression two Jews, three opinions.

As for other groups, groups I'm not part of, yes, I do very much feel an obligation as a Jewish person to combat prejudice where I can. But calling people on racism (or other -isms) is very different from educating people about what it's like to be a member of $minority. If I start getting questions on the latter I'm much more likely to direct people to resources or preferably someone who actually knows it from personal experience.

Then there are groups that I am perceived externally as being part of, but don't really see as part of my identity. I don't feel like I have anything to say about being bisexual, or being female. Clearly I don't want people to discriminate against bisexuals (or queer people in general), or against women, but that's part of my general desire for people not to be prejudiced rather than something I feel personally.

[(Anonymous)]

I guess it depends on the question. I can certainly talk about what it's like to be a member of *a* minority group - not only as a Jew but as a woman in engineering, for example. But you're right that minority experiences also differ in important ways. I think I may have a little more insight into what it's like being black, for example, than, say, a male WASP, but "a little insight" is a far cry from actually knowing what it's like. And, caveat again, there are certainly some male WASPs who do know more about it than I ever will, for instance someone with a black sibling, cousin, or very close friend.

Being a woman isn't something you see as part of your identity? That's really rare, in a society that still often assigns toys, clothes, and even assumed personality facets by gender. I can't even guss if that would make living in this society simpler or more complicated.

[dichroic.livejournal.com]

Sorry, previous comment was me. I commented before logging in.