Noodling

[redbird]

Yes, true is complex (as serenejournal put it today.

I know that part of my lack of interest in Valentine's Day is connected to my general lack of interest in organized/scheduled holidays the rest of the year. Another part is that it's too often used, not as a celebration of love, but as a way of making single people--and anyone whose life isn't in a neat heterosexual couple, for that matter--feel excluded. And, of course, it's a serious Hallmark Holiday.

Besides, I'm not thrilled with a cultural structure that makes it difficult for me to shop for chocolate--something I very much like--at certain times of year.

However, I wonder if my difficulty in time-binding, in remembering how long ago things were and sometimes even what happened after which, is exacerbated by, or shares a cause with, that dislike of tracking holidays and anniversaries and such.

copperwise posted about why she does like Valentine's Day, because it also pressures people to acknowledge their partners and lovers. There's some good discussion out of that, including a remark by rysmiel about not getting or doing romance.

And I'm not sure if I do or not, because there may be more definitions of romance than of love. Or as many (even if we discard the ones that are purely literary). If this post has a purpose, it's to remind me to return to some of these thoughts.

Comments

[eleanor.livejournal.com]

I've always had a problem with V-Day, have always wanted the chocolate and flowers, felt like a loser for wanting it, and have seldom gotten it and then feel both angry and guilty at the anger. This year V-day is a kid day, and I got around it be inviting the kids, ex H.B, his girldriend and her baby, Harry, and my house guest, and declaring them all my Valentines. There will be chocolate and cards for everybody, pink food and drinks, and it will be fun for everybody. Having them all come here is better than going out to dinner or getting flowers, at least for me.

Similarly, we used to celebrate "everybody's birthday," a day each summer in which the entire extended family was assembled for a festive meal, everyone bough everyone else anonymous and inexpensive gifts, and there was a cake wishing eveerybody a happy birthday. So many occasions can be exclusive, and there is something to be said for being inclusive.

[fuzzygabby.livejournal.com]

I've always had a problem with V-Day, have always wanted the chocolate and flowers, felt like a loser for wanting it, and have seldom gotten it and then feel both angry and guilty at the anger.

I love that! That describes me feelings, exactly.