"it's a tradition"

[redbird]

I got a party invitation a couple of days ago.

Nothing unusual in that--people have parties, sometimes they invite me.

What's unusual is that this one includes the statement "I really don't feel like a party right now, but after 22 years, people would show up anyway and if we called everyone to cancel, there would still be a crowd, but made up mostly of people we don't know, so we're having the party anyway. But don't expect Ken to be in a party mood."

I haven't decided whether to go--they don't ask for RSVPs. It'll depend in part on the weather: if it's too hot, I can't do this, a small apartment and lots of people, with the roof as the only relief. But, beyond that, I only know Ken and Mercy casually, and I'm not sure whether it would be kinder to show up and commiserate with the reasons Ken doesn't feel in a party mood, and let them see another familiar face, or to not show up and thus not make Ken deal with one more person when he's not in a party mood.

I hope never to wind up in the position they're in: feeling forced to entertain because there's no way to get the word out that they don't want to.

Comments

[roadnotes.livejournal.com]

Much like BeyondtheCon turned into, I think: "we've done it so long, we have to keep doing it."

That's awful.

[hawkida.livejournal.com]

If it were me I think I'd make sure not to invite anyone, mention to as many as it's easy to reach that it's not happening this year, and then arrange to be elsewhere.

tradtional parties

[(Anonymous)]

We used to joke that Eileen Gunn and John Berry moved away from Seattle so that they wouldn't have to throw the new year's eve party! But I don't think it's true.

Anita Rowland (http://www.anitarowland.com/)

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

Wow. That borders on rude. I don't think I would go.

B